Poor Sasukekun
by WaterBender101
Summary: Sakura is in love with all guys but Sasuke, and Sasuke truely loves Sakura! With the help of Kakshi, he will get Sakura to love him again, but BEWARE OF RANDOMNESS! rated for language
1. Ramen

Hello my minions-I mean my dear writers…….Yes! this is the great fanfic written by me! But it will have many short and random crossovers, like Edward from full metal alchemists might come in for like ten minutes, or Raimundo from xiaolin showdown might cut the lawn with scissors…… so what are you waiting for? Read it!

Chapter 1-Ramen

(Sasuke POV)

I was sitting under the tree watching Sakura beat the crap out of Naruto. God, sometimes I, yes, I, the great and perfect fearless prodigy, Sasuke, I fear Sakura's wrath. BUT, only sometimes. I sighed.

"NARUTO YOU BAKA WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! YOU GO OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFREIND AND ALL YOU DO IS DROOL OVER RAMEN! ONE MORE TIME AND IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU!" yelled Sakura. Wait, what? Sakura is going out with Naruto? What? That's not Sakura, she'd never go out with naruto even if I told her to.

"I-I'm s-sor-rry-y S-sa-saku-ku-r-r-a!" whimpered Naruto, trying to not get hurt, the typical dobe, but still, I was in great shock that that DOBE is going out with MY cherry blossom. Yes people, I am madly in love with Sakura, but I don't tell anyone because love is a weakness, Itachi told me. (A/N: Itachi's good, he has to be in my fanfic, I mean, who else will join the donut lovers club with Vash, hmm? I thought so. So yeah, Sasuke looks up to Itachi.) So, I just kept it to myself. I hated this, No one normal will swoon over me…… or will they? An evil plot was forming in my head while I was laughing maniacally rather loudly. Sakura, Naruto and Kakashi were staring at me if I was mad, I was to tell the truth, but they don't need to need to know that……..

"What do you want losers?" I spat at them as If I never laughed.

"Sasuke, you were laughing….." Naruto commented. Damn, how am I going to get out of this one?

"No I wasn't, youre just too high off of ramen to know whats real and fake." I told him, and he bought it. How stupid can blondes be?

"But Sasuke, I heard it too…" Sakura told me WITHOUT the –kun….grr…..

"Uh, you're tired from yelling at Naruto, and you're hallucinating things…." I explained. She raised an eyebrow, but I sent her a death glare so she turned away…. I'm sorry Sakura, I had to! I mentally beat myself up, then noticed Kakashi was still staring at me in awe. "What are you looking at, never seen me?" I yelled.

"You laughed…" he whispered, but I caught it, yes, being perfect comes with great hearing.

"No I didn't." I tried to explain, but I didn't have an explanation, I couldn't even tell him to go back to read his little orange book, he didn't have it……..

"Uh, yes you did, Sasuke, are you having evil thoughts maybe?" he raised his visible eyebrow at me.

"Fine, only because you're somewhat intelligent, not as much as me, but still you aren't stupid, I'll let you help me in my evil plot. MWAHAHAHAHAH-BWAHAHHAHAHA-AHAHAHAHAHAHA-cough-cough" I laughed maniacally once again. Naruto and Sakura turned to look at me, and in return, I showed them the beautiful ring that I, erm, borrowed, that matched my eyes. And guess what finger it was, kiddies! The middle one, of course. They went back to their- whatever they were doing…..

"So, what's that plot of yours, Sasuke?" Kakashi asked.

"Well……" I told him the whole plan from start to finish, but I'm not stupid, I didn't tell him I loved Sakura.

A few minutes later, Naruto was eating the 30 crates of ramen we bought like there was no tomorrow, Sakura ad dumped him in front of the whole world (powers of fangirls and a cell) and I was ready to make my move on Sakura and make her swoon over me, BUT NO! HE just HAD to come. Now I'd need a new plot……

"Kakashi….." I started, looking at him with my beautiful onyx eyes, pouting.

"fine, but I'll make the plan myself this time…..

Ooooooooooooooo, who is the guy that made Sakura fall in love with himself? Ill give you a very very very very small clue- he is a chuunin (sp?). What? Did you expect me to tell you his sur name? haha poor naïve children you are…….. review! Or I wont post the next chapter, where something big happens! O and if you guess who HE is, ill give you a cookie, and review all of your stories. Good deal, ne, ne?


	2. Donut Club?

Ok my duckies, ONLY ONE REVIEWER? I thank you Katon Ryuuka no Jutsu for reviewing. You totally rock, its not even funny. Well, HE shall be my favourite character, none other than SASBAKU NO GAARA! BOW DOWN TO HIS GREATNESS! Hehe…. Just had coffee… anways. Yeah, I own naruto, and I can fly, the dubbed version would be way way way better than it is now if I owned naruto! And for you slow people that I ever so love, I DON'T OWN NARUTO DAMMIT!

Chapter 2-Donut Club?

(Sasuke POV)

"HAHA! I finally got Sakura to fall in love with me! Not like it was hard… but yeah, im the king of the world!" screamed Gaara. Pfft, I didn't have to do anything to make her love me, actually, pretend to hate her. Man, this guy has a huge ego.

"Hn." I said. For those of you with unintelligent people, I said 'Go fuck yourself with a broom' (A/N: YAY! FOAMY!).

"Where do you want to go my little cherry blossom?" he asked her formally, making her giggle.

"Hmmm… O! I know where we can go!" Sakura piped.

"So do I!" I mocked, pretending to be a preppy gay boy.

"Really? Do enlighten us with your knowledge, Sasuke." Gaara replied, getting suspicious, and tightening his grip on Sakura's tiny little waist. That should be my hand there.

"It's totally this coolio place," I said, still mocking them, "Its like red, I know you two like that colour, and like there's this guy, he's red too!" I exclaimed. Obviously they didn't catch my drift… how stupid can they be? Well, Sakura is way smarter, but I fear that all these losers that she's going out with are rubbing off on her. Then, I subconsciously went behind Sakura and started rubbing my back on hers.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" Gaara screamed, jumping in front of Sakura.

"Your stupidity was rubbing off on her, so I thought I'd rub my greatness on her" I smirked, pissing of Gaara even more.

"WHY YOU LITTLE BAS-" he started, glaring at me… as if that'd do anything.

"STOP IT YOU TWO!" yelled Sakura, getting in between us. "If you two don't stop, I'll never speak to either again!" she cried.

"Fine… Come on Sasuke." Called Kakashi to me as is I was a lost dog.

"DONUT CLUB DONUT CLUB!" yelled Vash from nowhere………

"DONUT CLUB? MY DREAM COME TRUE!" squealed Itachi, while everyone sweat dropped, except for Vash.

"YAY! YOU ARE THE FIRST TO JOIN THE DONUT CLUB!" Vash said, hugging Itachi, and they both cried their hearts out………, then Gai came and put up a sunset background…

"Kakashi……" I started.

"Yep, I stared this!" he stated proudly.

"OMFG DONUTS!" screeched Gaara "DONUTS HERE I COME!"

"Wow Sakura, you're getting dumped for food so often these days……"Sai said, coming out of nowhere, just like Vash.

"NOOOOO GAARA-KUN! FINE! I HATE YOU! I HATE ALL OF YOU, YOU DAMN BASTARDS!" sobbed/screamed Sakura.

THEN…

"Sakura…" I started

"Yes Sasuke?" she asked, me wincing at the fact that she didn't say kun.

"Well, Sakura, I-"

"SAKURA I LOVE YOU WILL YOU YOUTHFULLY GO OUT WITH ME?" we all turned to find the owner of the dreaded sentence that ONLY I was supposed to ask…

OOOOOO other cliffy…… hmm but its easy to know who the next guy is… anyways, REVIEW OK? I ONLY GOT ONE DAMN REVIEW that I am very grateful for AND HATS IT? WHAT, YOU DON'T WANT ME TO WRITE MORE? FINE! I WONT! IF I DON'T GET THREE REVIEW FOR THIS CHAPTER, I WON'T WRITE MORE!pouts

Jack Spicer: Here, have an evil cookie.

Me: thanks! munches on cookie

Omi: you do know that that cookie had an evil demon inside of it?

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAH-BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA-AHAHAHAHAHA-cough cough

Jack Sparrow: O dear, this is going to take a while…

Jack Spicer: YES! MY EVIL PLAN HAS WORKED!

Omi: YOU? You had a plan? Are you childing me?

Raimundo: Its KIDDING Omi…

Omi: THAT TOO!

Jack Sparrow: I'm here for the gold I'm here for the gold. Anyways, review, and I'll give you a hug!


	3. Its a bird, its a plane! Its Kian?

OHHEEMGEEEE!thanks sooo so so so so so much for the reviews, lol. ARGH people, I need ideas! I cant think anymores! So if you want me to continue this story, REVIEW! Well, for the sake of giving ideas. Ok, next chapter, which guy should I put it? Kiba, Kisame, Kankuro, or Kabuto? YOU CHOOSE!

Me: YEAH! I OWN NARUTO! AND XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN! AND AVATAR!AND…. but I don't want to own kian…..

Naruto: WHAT! NOOOOOO!

Kakashi: Allie, my dear…… you don't own any of those shows…. And defiantly not me.

Me: what? Dammit, I WAS DAYDREAMING!

Kakashi:hehe… PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! on with the story! NOO! NOT THE BLOOD STAINED BUTCHER KNIFE!

Chapter 3- LOOK! It's a bird, it's a plane! No! its…. Kian?

"WHAT?" I yelled. Not again! "Lee! What the hell are you doing here?"

"TO ASK MY YOUTHFUL SAKURA OUT!" he screamed in my ear. Wow, I wonder how I'm not deaf…

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! YOU'RE WAY TOO LOUD!" I screamed back at him. Then, he did cool pose #52, when he shows off his shiny teeth…shiny…..and does a thumbs up sign.

"O Lee! I'd love to go out with you!" Sakura said.

"That's right, now go and shave your eyebro-WHAT!" I jumped up with frustration and fright.

"Dude, you heard her, she's going out with Lee!" smiled Kian, one of the authors good friends.

"Why the hell are you here anyways?" I spat, scowling at the smiling boy.

"Oh, Kakashi invited me here…. I LOVE LEE!" he screamed… well, they are both loud as hell…. Lee then turned around and stared at Kian.

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"KIAN!"

"LEEE!"

"GET ON WITH IT ALREADY DAMMIT!" We yelled, that is, me, Kakashi, Naruto and…. Omi? Anyways, Kian and Lee ran up to each other and hugged and sobbed, a weird sunset background came up, sobbed a bit more, and then…

"I LOVE YOU KIAN!"

"I LOVE YOU LEE!"

"WAIT, WHAT ABOUT ME!" Sakura screamed at the two boys, glaring flames and daggers at them.

"Go to hell, Lee is MINE! MINE I TELL YOU! MINE!" screamed Kian possesivly, practically killing the spandex wearing chuunin.

"I'm sorry Sakura…. Why don't you go out with Sasuke, I know you've always liked him!" apologized and offered Lee.

"WAIT! STOP!"

I turned to see the owner of the voice, and it was none other than K-


End file.
